Saturday, December 26, 2009

What a 30 year old virgin looks like at 10

I hope his parents never let him live this down and they're always like "Hey Jimmy, remember that time we went to the petting zoo and you peed your pants because you were so scared of a horse? I mean, a horse for Christ's sake!"
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Thursday, December 24, 2009

Look what you did, you little jerk

This kid is so stupid. Who cries when meeting a guy who gives out Nintendo games and Nerf guns every year? Santa probably would never go to this kids house anyway. Also, check out this blog.
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Friday, December 18, 2009

Little kids are scared of fun

I guess you can't blame this kid completely. Look at her dumb mom who's also scared. It's a freaking roller coaster not Michael Jackson's pedophile village or whatever. I imagine this kid making this face whenever she is doing something that normal people would consider fun, like eating cotton candy or riding dirt bikes or whatever.
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Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Fake!

Wow kid, you're cool. That tattoo is clearly fake and it's not even a cool fake tattoo like a unicorn fighting a narwhal or a Bald Eagle with an American flag.
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Sunday, December 13, 2009

A good example of how not to use a slip n' slide

Don't invite this kid to your party. She will probably end up falling all over the place and breaking things.
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Friday, December 11, 2009

This kid is so weak that even his old ass grandpa owned him at football

I bet you that old guy's knees don't even work properly and yet, he blew that little kid up with an epic stiff arm. I hope grandpa did a sweet touchdown dance in this kid's grass-stained face after this ownage and I bet he said something like "don't stand on the tracks when the train's coming through, bitch."
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Wednesday, December 9, 2009

His parents immediatly regretted buying this trumpet

This kid is so bad at playing the trumpet that only stuffed animals will listen to his crappy playing. I wish I was there so I could tell him to just give up and that he is making his teddy bears ears bleed.
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Saturday, December 5, 2009

Trust me, little kids absolutely suck at snowball fights

If this little punk tried to throw a snowball at me I would push her down and whitewash her face into the snow and ice, even though her snowball probably wouldn't even come close to me because of her crappy snowball making/throwing skills. And then I'd be like "Don't start what you can't finish, you big crybaby."
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Thursday, December 3, 2009

No matter how much they practice, little kids will never beat me in a fight

Don't let the belts fool you, I bet I could take on all these little ninja wannabes at the same time. I would just push the big fat one on the right into all the smaller ones.
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